Matthew 25:1-13
A. INTRODUCTION
One of the things about life is that the things that we see, and experience, are often far removed from the way things were intended to be. Even among Christians, we may believe that God created the world in a particular manner, and that it’s supposed to tick over in a particular way, but the reality is that over time we have changed God’s created world. Our priorities have changed, and as a consequence things are not always the way that they should be.
Now some might like to extol the wonders of this modern age. and others might like to praise days gone by. But the reality is that things are not quite that simple; it’s not that black and white.
So, what I’d like to do is to look at this passage from Matthew’s Gospel—the idea of a wedding. And I’d like to use it to show just how much we have moved away from the ways things were and the way things are meant to be.
B. LESSON 1: Changing Customs
And the first example relates to the passage of time.
1. Modern Customs
Because the customs of weddings have changed. Whereas, in days gone by, churches have been considered the place to be married, increasingly that is becoming less so. And it is not uncommon, these days, for couples to be married on a beach, in a garden, or in a lovely old home.
The customs regarding engagements have also changed. And many couples live together for years before even getting engaged. And getting engaged (and consequently married) often signals the point to which couples want to have children.
Now, for some, who see that the church has a role to play, and that couples aren’t really married unless they have been married in the church, yes, they might like to throw their hands up in horror regarding modern day practices. However, the reality is that people have not always been married in church. And, in fact, that the practice only began about the 4th century A.D. And it only really became common amongst the masses in the late Middle Ages.
2. First Century Palestine Customs
And contrast these traditional views of marriage with what we see in first century Palestine, and we see something different again.
Because the customs regarding a betrothal was that it was really the first stage of marriage. It did not allow couples to live together, and yet it a betrothal was taken so seriously that it took divorce proceedings to dissolve one.
Furthermore, if a woman got pregnant before her wedding day it was punishable by being stoned to death—and the father of the child was expected to be stoned to death too, even though most of the time the man was often let go.
And regarding the wedding itself . . . Regarding at least the wealthy, the marriage took place on a Wednesday if the bride was a virgin and on a Thursday if she were a widow. And the idea was that the bridegroom and his party would make their way to the home of the bride. After which, they would process to the home of the bridegroom for the wedding feast, where the feasting would go on for several days.
There was no ceremony conducted in any church, synagogue, or any other religious building. In fact, no ceremony at all—just a celebration.
3. Summary
The customs of today (and even the customs that some people yearn to return to), then, are very different and far removed from the customs of first century Palestine.
As a consequence, one of the things about this story, from Jesus, is that we are reminded that customs change. And while some might like to hold on to particular customs from the past, even those customs can be far removed from the way people did things before that. And, indeed, the modern trend of not being married in church—or simply living together—is actually a harking back to older days when it wasn’t the custom to having wedding ceremonies at all.
We need to be careful, then, of being too critical of our changing world. Some things may have been done better in the past—through the traditions that some people like to hang on to—but that is not true of all things.
C. LESSON 2: Appropriate Behaviour
1. The Story
The second thing about weddings, that can be far removed, relates to the attitude of the bride’s friends in Jesus’s story. There were ten of them, and they fell into two groups—some of them we’re told were wise, and some of them were foolish.
Now these ten girls had a very important part to play in the wedding. Receiving the groom into the bride’s house and then escorting the newlyweds to the grooms house for the feast were both very important parts of their wedding culture. And, as a consequence, it was important that they were all well prepared as they waited for the groom to arrive.
Unfortunately, as we’re told, the foolish girls had no spare oil with them at all. They would have had oily rags on the end of the torches which would burn brightly, but they had not bothered to bring any extra oil to use at all. Now, this wasn’t a lack of foresight that could be excused by the long delay of the bridegroom, this was an inexcusable sign of laziness and unwillingness to be prepared on their behalf. And particularly so, in a society where people put little store on punctuality, and where preparations for a wedding were extensive and time consuming.
Now, the sensible girls had reasoned that there was no way of knowing when the bridegroom would make his appearance. So they had prepared themselves with spare oil in flasks. But the foolish girls had made no such preparations.
And, of course, the inevitable happened. The bridegroom was late. But then in those days it was normal for the bridegroom, not the bride, to be late. The bridegroom would deliberately take his time, and everyone knew that, for no one would have expected him to be punctual. And because they knew that, the ten girls nodded off to sleep knowing that when the bridegroom arrived there would be plenty for them to do.
However, part of the way through the night, the time came; the groom was sighted as coming, and the command to go and meet him was given. So the girls lit their lamps, and they went out to give him the appropriate welcome. But as the groom came, the difference between the two groups of girls began to appear.
Now, a torch would only hold a small amount of oil. And it was all consumed between the time of the shout of the groom coming, and his actual arrival. So the foolish girls now found themselves in trouble. Their torches were going out, and there would be no place in a torchlight procession for girls whose torches gave out no light.
And, unfortunately for them, the wise girls didn’t have enough to not only provide for themselves but to give some give away too. Furthermore, there may have been even more delays. And so the foolish girls had to rush into town, somehow wake up the owner of some oil, and get some fresh supplies. And, while they were doing that, they missed the procession back to the groom’s house. And, as a consequence, with friends like that, is it any wonder that they were then excluded from the festivities at the groom’s house.
2. Summary
In this story, then, there is a marked contrast between the wise and the foolish girls. Because the foolish girls showed themselves up because their behaviour was far removed from what it should have been.
This story of Jesus, then, shows that there is correct behaviour and incorrect behaviour. And the one is far removed from the other.
The foolish girls were lazy and slack, they were not really committed to their friend, the bride. And, by their actions, they show scant respect for her future husband too. Their behaviour was not as it should be.
In contrast, however, the wise girls had a deep respect for both bride and groom. So much so, that they were prepared and ready—and probably had even over prepared themselves, providing more oil than necessary in case the groom would delay them further.
Jesus’s story, then, is a challenge for correct behaviour. It’s a challenge for us to do our bit, and to be prepared to even do more than our bit. It’s a story of the need to play our part in life, by doing all the preparations necessary. It’s also about the consequences of being lazy, and not being ready to play our part.
D. LESSON 3: COMMITMENT TO JESUS
1. The Purpose of the Parable
Which then leads us to the third example of how things are often far removed. And that relates to the purpose of this parable.
Because this story is not just about any wedding, it’s the story of the wedding of Christ to his bride. It’s about the banquet for the faithful at the end of the age. This is a story about how Jesus (the groom) will come again, but we don’t know when, and we can expect long delays. But he will come, and he will come when people are not expecting him.
As a consequence, it’s a story about the need for people everywhere to be ready and waiting, and not get caught short when he unexpectedly arrives. Because those who are not ready, those who have not accepted Jesus as their Lord and Saviour, and those who are not making themselves ready for his arrival, will be caught short and not given a second chance.
When he arrives, it doesn’t matter how much rushing around those who are unprepared for his arrival will do, it will be too late. They will then be excluded; the door will be shut on them entering heaven, and they will be excluded from the heavenly feast.
2. Comment
The contrast between the foolish girls and the wise girls, then, is the story of the difference between what will happen to those who have faith and what will happen to those who have no faith. And the difference is how far removed one is from the other.
When Jesus, the Son of Man comes, there is a dreadful fate awaiting those who should be watching out for his arrival, but fail to do so. And therefore this story tells that such people effectively exclude themselves from being among the people of God. As a consequence, the Saviour will not recognise them among the saved.
Having effectively shut themselves off from him while he was away, means that there will be no way by which he can accept them at the end.
E. CONCLUSION
Now, as I said at the beginning, one of the features of life is that the things that we see, and experience, are often far removed from the way things were intended to be. Some may believe that God created the world in a particular manner—or that it’s supposed to tick over in a particular way—but the reality is that, over time, we have changed God’s created world. Our priorities have changed too.
So whether we want to extol the wonders of this modern age, or even praise days gone by, the reality is, that things just aren’t that simple.
Because the Gospel story—the story of the wise and foolish girls—is a reminder that customs change. And even the ones we like to hold on to—and hold high—have changed from the one’s people practiced before. Customs don’t always change for the better, sometimes they are an improvement, and sometimes the old ones, which people hold dear, have much to be desired.
This Gospel story, then, reminds us that it is important to get things right. It’s important to play our part, to be ready and involved and not get caught short. There is appropriate behaviour and there is inappropriate behaviour. And the price of being caught short is that we can miss out on things and be excluded from other things altogether.
For this Gospel story reminds us that the most important thing in life is the need to prepare ourselves for the next one.
After all, when Jesus comes again—to judge the world and to sit down with the faithful at his wedding feast—where will you and I be? Will we be inside joining in the festivities? Or will we be excluded, and excluded from heaven forever?
What we need to do, then, is to consider whether we are truly ready. Because we need to make sure that we don’t get caught out when the bridegroom—Jesus—suddenly appears.
Posted: 1st June 2023
© 2023, Brian A Curtis
www.brianacurtis.com.au